Seriously,

I once knew this guy who hit a deer with his truck. Thinking the deer dead, he did what any logical person would do; he shoved it into the pickup to take home for dinner. However, instead of shoving it into the bed of the truck, he put it in the passenger seat where it soon awoke and began thrashing around. He killed it with a 2x4. This guy reminds me of him. Seriously, how do you get "mysteriously shot"?